Confession: I Used Performance Enhancing Drugs Too
Another shocking admission today...I used performance enhancing drugs just like Lance Armstrong.
Well, let me clarify. I didn't actually take any of the substances that he mentioned in his drawn out Oprah Winfrey confession show (which by the way is the first time that any of us has actually tuned our TV in to her channel). But, I did consider taking other types performance enhancing drugs such as: Viagra, Extenze, Cialis, and at one point even rams pee. Who are we kidding though, I wasn't going to see any great improvement in my physical performance. There will be no yellow jerseys for me, no million dollar contracts. And just the thought of 7 wins is ridiculous....the ladies still label me as "One and Done Daniel".
My Oprah special will be airing next week.
The sad thing is, I could be telling the truth about this, but nobody will be able to prove that I'm lying because nobody watches her network anyway.
Well, let me clarify. I didn't actually take any of the substances that he mentioned in his drawn out Oprah Winfrey confession show (which by the way is the first time that any of us has actually tuned our TV in to her channel). But, I did consider taking other types performance enhancing drugs such as: Viagra, Extenze, Cialis, and at one point even rams pee. Who are we kidding though, I wasn't going to see any great improvement in my physical performance. There will be no yellow jerseys for me, no million dollar contracts. And just the thought of 7 wins is ridiculous....the ladies still label me as "One and Done Daniel".
The sad thing is, I could be telling the truth about this, but nobody will be able to prove that I'm lying because nobody watches her network anyway.
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